Golden State trade off

POSTED IN | 11:27 PM
Sometimes people move. And on occasion, when the celestials lineup, these moving people need help. And sometimes they need a lot of help.

And so, here I am, going to California, to make a trip out of saying farewell to some truly golden amigos (Dave and Syd) who will call L.A. their new headquarters. I might do a spot of driving along the way too. We'll see.

We roll out on the morrow, U-haul style. We got the 12-footer. It has a big walrus on the side of it. I feel this can only be a good omen. Like the ancient eskimos of the north used to say: "a walrus a day keeps the engine trouble at bay." Or something like this. It doesn't translate so well.

So goodbye, Sooner state. I'll be back soon enough, but sans two compadres. But we don't have to get to that part just yet. There's still about 1,600 miles to go.

Super Dave, loading miscellaneous crap for a killer last-minute Goodwill run.

I'm taking the more managerial, supervisor role in this whole thing.

We're also gonna spend New Year's Eve at the Wigwam Village in Arizona. Boss. I'm excited. Nothing like a concrete tee pee motel room to ring in the new year, eh? I find I'm easily amused. Cheap thrills, people. The best kind. Oh, and we're gonna have fireworks too. The deluxe accommodation package, most def.


As a side rant, I'm realizing more and more my hatred for owning stuff. Perhaps it's the fact that I've helped a good number of people move this year (a good remedy for accumulation). I don't know.

The ownership of material goods feels emotionally oppressive to me. And when you're straining your back over the matter, physically oppressive too. Here are some rules I think the congress should usher right into the law books, effective immediately:

1) If you own china, for the love, use it! If you don't use it X amount of times per year, you must get rid of it by means of violent destruction in the shaming presence of famous homemakers (i.e. Martha Stewart).

2) You shall never own anything made mostly of glass. This is a terrible furniture material and should by no means be moved lengthy distances to subsequent dwelling places. Melt it down. Shatter it. Turn it back into sand. But just. Don't. Move it.

3) Futon mattresses will hereby be forbidden on all accounts. They are hellishly un-wieldly and unfit for manual human transportation.

4) Adopt the motto: "We don't need this much flipping crap!" Use it often. Catechize yourself with it. You will learn to like the results it produces.

5) Follow the above rules in accordance to the law, BUT: In the end, it's really better to SELL ALL and start with NOTHING in said new location. Trust me. It's the best option.

These should be the rules. Our country would be a better place. Our backs would be healthier. Our spirits lighter. Our moving-buddy friends happier. And our homes more blissfully modest.

Seriously. We don't need this much flipping crap. Do we?

NOTE: this post in no way reflects the negative moral character of Dave and Syd on account of them owning stuff. and honestly, they are quite modestly loaded. praise the good fortune gods.

7 Responses to 'Golden State trade off'

  •'> 7:55 AM

    I have the answer! Go check out this video on you tube: George Carlin Talks About Stuff It's EXACTLY what you are talking about! Don't want to post it because George Carlin can get a little crass - take care with the language. Erin

  • mikepettengill said...'> 8:56 AM

    The drive sounds great...I've something like it several times. Take lots of pics...plenty to see...especially in Arizon, New Mexico and Califronia.

  • Daughter of Eve said...'> 9:06 AM

    If D & S didn't have all that flipping crap you wouldn't be going to the Wigwam for New Year's. I think you should be thankful.

    I'm going to go to Goodwill right now and get you some China, a glass coffee table, and a nice rattan papisan with futon mattress. You need some things like that in a bad way. They represent stability, a home, and a future.

  • peachesandplums said...'> 6:18 PM

    i totally did that drive in jan 06! and saw the wig wams/dinosaurs. you have to stop in ABQ and get a green chile cheeseburger at Lindy's downtown = delish!

    if you decide to head north from socal, give me a holla.

  • Anonymous said...'> 10:39 PM

    I definitely agree with Tam. Some stuff is homey and must be transported from place to place for stability sake. For example, things I always take with me: My perfume, it makes me feel girly and pretty. My 3 figurines from Great Grandma, my cushy cloud bed, my queen chair and my picture albums. I also take candles but am not particularly attached to one at the moment. And while I don't have china right now I most certainly will soon because it is pretty whether I use it or not. It is not so much about the stuff as the fact that it is what goes into making my home mine. Anyway, the right kind of stuff is nice, in my modest opinion.

  • Schupack said...'> 6:16 PM

    red shoes are back

    i feel like dumping some of my flippin crap now. i don't need it. i hate moving or storing it. it's gotta go! yes

  • Dr. Alex said...'> 11:51 PM

    The solution is simple. And I believe it has been suggested by several of the current presidential candidates. That is a consumption tax to replace the arcane and draconian income tax. This would solve 2 problems: eliminate all the crap you speak of and dramatically increase the savings of the average American. Just a thought.